Happy Chinese New Year!
By Animah Kosai
When I turned twelve, I discovered I was a sheep.
Image: Sean the Sheep
This was very disturbing to me. I wished I was a year older, then I would be a horse. The wild freedom and glamour of the horse appealed to me. What did a sheep do? Baa, follow the herd and give up its wool? I was a quiet child, didn’t conform and had no intention of living my life so others could take any part of me.
There was no way I was going to live my life the way the Chinese zodiac dictated.
I generally forget my sheep label until this time of every year, when I scan down the Chinese zodiac forecasts. Will the sheep find romance in the year of the Rat? Will the sheep gain wealth in the year of the Rabbit? Will the sheep finally find the courage to tell her boss to go shove it in the year of the Dragon? 
A day later and I’ve forgotten the forecasts and life is again full of surprises. From a girl, I became a woman. A far stronger label than being a sheep. Throughout my years of school and university, girls and women were strong, capable and approached tasks with fiery determination.
Then women entered the real world.
Men dominated that world – as boyfriends, husbands, bosses, decision makers. I watched the fiery women slip into the shadows as they “settled down”, had little lambs of their own and got caught up with the complexities of nurturing their children, pleasing their husbands, their families, their bosses, keeping up appearances with society, cooking healthy tasty food (a contradiction in terms) … how incredibly exhausting.On top of this women had to look good with immaculate hair, natural make up and clothes that other women would envy.
Which woman had time to climb the corporate ladder or become head of state if she had to deal with all that?!
Women were told how they had to behave. If not their husbands or male colleagues, then certainly by the media, religious leaders and the worst dictates of all – other women. And it all hits home. I am in a flock of sheep, and the moment I dare break out of the flock, the spotlight is on me. The only real safety is to rejoin the flock and be like everyone else. It is the easiest and most comfortable place to be.
Can you spot me hiding among the flock?
But if all of us women stay in our comfortable flock, women’s fate will never change. Since I started this journey of breaking out, I have found other brave women already on the journey. Dina Zaman who broke ranks because she dare write about Malay Muslims showing up the hypocrisy they live in. Marina Mahathir who championed the rights of those living with HIV with great compassion, Zainah Anwar who with Sisters In Islam, opened Muslim women’s eyes to the possibilities that life was more than conforming to male dictated laws.
On the international stage, world leaders like Angela Merkel command respect and Sheryl Sandberg made us see how our entrenched beliefs held us back with Lean In. Laura Bates raised awareness of how much sexism still pervades our society with #EverydaySexism . That fiery clever female wizard, Emma Watson has burst into the scene with her #heforshe tagline reminding men that helping us is better for all.
Emma Watson at the World Economic Forum in Davos a month back launching Impact 10x10x10
In just the past 5 years, women are waking up from their sheeplike state. This time round the Chinese have rebranded the Year of the Sheep to the Year of the Goat. (See this entertaining BBC News snippet on the confusion http://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-china-31511109 ). Less submissive, a little more aggressive perhaps. It is a relief to discover that I can be anything with hooves that eats grass. and bleats. Yes! I don’t have to be a sheep. I can be a llama! In fact I feel like an alpaca, sticking my neck a little higher than the rest so others can see me shine.
This is why we formed Surya Women. We believe women have so much they are holding within whether through fear, doubt and unawareness. The world needs you. So, yes, break out of the flock – in groups perhaps, hold your head up and shine. We wish you Happy New Year of the Alpaca!
Surya Women 